The Right Path
Was reading yw2k blog these afternoon. His latest blog describing how much he wants to help his friend, but there is nothing much he could do since his friend didn't wanna trouble him in anyway. I do understand his friend decision. Sometimes, you just need someone there to just listen his/her predicament and thats all. Have you guys ever come to face this kinda situation before? I'm sure at any point of out life, there are always ups and downs. When comes to thing that is really troubling your mind day and night, what would u guys? Just let be? Or you will find your closes friend, you spill your heart and soul to that person, and have someone to hear you out. Although, there is nothing much your friend could do, but just that the moment in time, you have someone to just lend his/her shoulder to cry on, thats all it needs to make someone feel better......
Life is such. One moment you are free feeling happy and gay, like everything is going on your way. And next moment, the least you expected, it just strike right in front of your face and your brain is fill with "what if", "how come ", "can this be it" all the uncertainty that you also won't know what will be the outcome at the end of day. Unless you confront the whole situation, else, how would u ever know the answer ? Or maybe someone of us, we might not want to know the outcome, and just time dictate the next course of action. It is at this moment in time, when a friend is all we need to help us ease our mind..Not to solve the problem, but to hear us out....Not to judge us what is wrong or right, but to understand why we want someone to listen to our problem.........Hmm....life...........is this what you called a test of time? Gawd is testing oneself how he or she goin to handle the situation, hopefully whatever the outcome will be, it will make that person a better person........I dunno..I really do not know what is wrong or what is right. The thing i want to really know, why now? After all this year....why now.....i'm clueless....Can someone show me the path......Gawd, can you show me the right path........
12, 5, 3, 2
Time now is just after eighteen minutes past nine at night. I'm in my room now, with the AC on and everything seems to be so quiet and serene. Comparing the last few days what i have gone through, this is definately something that i will cherish for now. Just got back from dinner, still raining at the moment, weather is pretty cooling. Had my shower, brush my teeth, make myself a cup of hot tea and here i am now, putting down some thought that has been playing in my mind lately.
Twelve classes for the last five days, running in between 2 gyms, Hartamas and Taipan, doing three types of classes, from dancing to cardio workout to wave machines. That was basically how i spent my holidays. Deepavali, Hari Raya, doing classes. Back-to-back classes. After today, i felt like i have achieved or done so much, wonder where i get all this strength and energy. I really do not know how long i could sustain this kinda pace in life. Don't get me wrong ppl, doing those classes are really fun and enjoyable. Seeing how members respond to you at the end of the day, it just makes everything worthwhile and at the same time, you too workout together. But there are times, like today, after the classes was over, was thinking to myself, how long more can i do this ? Can my body handle it? Even if i'm physically fit, how bout mentally? When is the time when you are going to draw the line, that enough is enough. I don't wanan do it, i wanna just sit back, and relax, and let the day just passes me by not having to shout or jump or sweat like a pig anymore. In actual fact, tonight, i thought after my dinner, i would wanna go window shopping and maybe check-out the new GAP boutique store in 1Utama. But after the dinner, the only thing that is on my mind was to drive straight back home and go to bed. So, am i missing something here? I really don't know. Right now, i am physically tired, but mentally i am still awake and sound. Maybe i am just too tired and exhausted.......Maybe after tonite, tomorrow will be a better day....or Maybe, it would be the same, the same old cycle going round and round and round...............
There are also other things that is going through my mind lately. Very obvious i can't really say much on the matter. Is something that i know it will not have a good ending, and yet it stills play in mind constantly every min, every hour, every second. Human being....human nature, is thier natuer to always be curious on thier surrounding. Do you know the feeling, when you see something you like, you have this very nice warm fuzzy feeling, hoping that you will get it, but you know very well you will never get it at the end? Well, you might be asking, since i know hows the ending gonna be, how am i going to handle it ? I don't know....i guess i just leave it to gawd hand to decide on my fate on this matter. Or maybe i should ask gawd, "Gawd, what should i do? I can't stop this feelin from growing every day passes by, the more i see, the more i like. What should i do Gawd....what should i do.........". I'm really tired........i'm really tired......
The Haze, The Marathon and The SMS
Back to afternoon shift these week. just got back from dinner with my colleagues. Another 2 more hours to go b4 i head back home. While having dinner tonight, thought were going thru my mind. Told myself i would like to blog something today. But i can't come to a conclusion as what i want to blog. About the haze that is never ending story? or what i did during the weekend? or maybe a very weird and startled sms i received in the morning today. And here i am now, sitting right infront of my notebook, staring at the screen, yet still have not decided which one i shud blog about....hmmm.......Maybe i should just blog everything at one go eh? ......yeah..i should just do that.....
Haze. Haze Haze......Where is this gonna end? When are we going to see that something is really done to the ppl who causes all this unnesessary situation that we have to suffered at the end? When is our government going to just stop talking and really show some action to this ppl? When can we stand this much longer? Can't they really see the history repeating itself?? Every year, every time when such situation happens, what we get in the newspaper is all about where and how this thing started. What API indicator is showing, what the government ppl is saying for the sake of saying for the newspaper to report. Ppl blaming is malaysian company that is the culprit, malaysian is blaming that our neighbouring country that has to be blame, you blame me i blame you. FARK!!! stop it lar. Even a 3yr child also know all this crap liow. Just show some action and stop it once and for all for gawd sake!!! Almost 5 years we have encountered this already, how many more years do you want your ppl to suffer ah ??? Pls bare in mind, next year is Visit Malaysia Year 2007. Unless u wanan change it to Visit Malaysia HAZY Year 2007, pls lar, i beg you my dear government, show your power lar..............sigh............
Ah, something light-hearted. Had a marathon weekend for myself. Started off on friday night, having two classes in a row non-stop till sunday. Sometimes i do wonder myself, how i could handle it .....Jam, Attack, Wave, Attack, Jam, Jam Attack, Wave.....Not only did i had marathon in classes, also had a movie marathon for the past 3 days. Is being awhile since i had watched movies at midnight. Kinda fun, brings back the younger days when bunch of my schoold friends going out late night to catch movies and talk cock! so i managed to catch World Trade Centre, Grudge 2, and the Jackie Chan new movie Row-B-Hood. Just a short summary of all the 3 movies.....>World Trade Centre, ok lar, boleh tahan movie. Expected to be very drama movie, infact i even prepared tissues to cry our loud liow....but in the end, not even a shed of tears came out from my eyes....Don't get me wrong, there were drama....heavy drama, is jsut that it is not drama enuf to make me cry......ahem...Next Grudge 2....two words to sums it all....FARK-UP movie!! Next!! Ahhhh Jackie Chan Rob-B-Hood. GREAT!!! Had a good laugh watching the movie. You have action, u have humour, you have drama, infact i did cry in the movie men!!! What moer can u ask for ?? If you guys havent catch it, pls do. Highly recommend affair. THe most memorable scene is the part when all the ppl (loan shark, policemen, the baby, the gf, the thiefs, all in one house) That you really have to watch....I laugh so loud, i think the gurl sitting next to me was abit scare of me........KAKAkAKKAKAKAKAka........
Now, on a serious note. This morning i received a very disturbing SMS. Lets just say, the SMS was not intended to send to me. I guess the sender could have just mistakenly send to the wrong person. End up i am the receiving end. When i read the msg, there was like 5 or 10 seconds silence, as i was having my b'fast at that time, i just stopped at everything i was doing and just read the msg all over again. I really do not know how i shuould react to that msg. Was i surprise? Frankly speaking, i was not. Bcause i do know eventually to certain extend 'it' will happened. When you are in this circle of life...this is something is very hard to stay true to it. No matter how much effort and time we put ourselves into it...we can just never guarantee that we can stay faithfull to the end. And the msg just prove us one thing, we have our weakness, we succumb to the desire, we are the prisoners to our horniness. Unless u decided to become a monk la ofcos....then this thing is pretty hard to control i guess. So, do i think that sender who send me the msges was doing a wrong thing. Nope, i don't think so. He is entitled to what he wants to do to his life. If that is what he wants at that moment, why not. But then, he has a bf?.....Ah huh!!!! So how now? Yes, he cheated on his bf thats for sure. B ut that is not us to judge or comment. Maybe they practice open-relationship. You never know. What about his bf is also someone you know? Can even consider your friend. What are you gonna do about it? R u not goin to tell that person? I have been thinking this the whole day trust me.....and i hv actually come to a conclusion. I will leave it as it is. Nope i won't go tell my friend that his bf is cheating on him. Neither would i confront the sender about the whole situation. Let the next action chart its course. If they are destine to be together, let it be. But one thing i am very very sure, they love each other very very much, that, i can say for sure.............
Are you Happy ?
It has been awhile since my last update on my blog. You readers must be wondering where have i been MIA. Nothing much happening since the last entry till lately. Life has been normal (which is good). Aside of having to fall ill (was gone thru a bad fever, cough almost whole week), and working shift that is bore to the max, else everything is movin on fine with me. Almost reaching the 4th week teaching the new BJAM release. Can gauge members already getting bore with the movement, some even already started to ask when am i gonna mix tracks...Thinking about it is already dreadful. How time flies, when is just like yesterday we only had the launch, and now members already askin to change tracks. Again have to force myself (and i do literally mean forcing myself) to learn up the old tracks again....hmmm.....tick tock tick tock..
On another note, which wat prompts me to write this down today. Was driving to work these morning and listenin to a particular chinese radio channel. Everymornin this program has a particular topic whereby listener can called up and share their views and opinion. Sometimes the topic can be very heavy and other times could be a lighter side of life. Today, since is the Friday 13th, the DJs decided to ask listeners to share thier experience encountering any bad luck of sort. And omg!! i tell you, i never laugh so much in my life listening to the callers relating thier experince while i was driving. Some of the callers who called, their experience was really hilarious to max. eg. tyre puncture not once, but twice in the same day. The ordeal of checking the luggage in the airport to the time it touchdown. It was soo hilarious, i was practically laughing out loud in my car while driving. Other cars passing by must be wondering what is wrong wiht this driver......
While hearin all this funny stuff and laughing at the same time, something just struck me. Its been awhile since i laugh this way...and is really really liberating to say the least. It came into my mind, how, we as human being, always strive for perfertion in life, how our lifes can be so routine and mundane, goin to work, off work, stay home, watch tv chasing our dream...etc....until we sometime neglect or even forget how to enjoy life. At that moment in time, as i was laughing, i just feel nice.....its like everything is no longer important to me, is like a heavy stone just lifted off from my shoulder....i just feel nice, happy and GAY!!!! hiak!!! so ppl, ask yourself this, when was the last time you really had a good big laugh? When was the last time that u really realy sat down think about the life you are going thru now? R u happy? R u happy wiht the ways that is going thru wiht your life ? R u doin anything about it ? At the end of the day, is our life, no one can help us, no one knows better than we know about ourselves.....Food for thought.....Have a good weekend :)
